I am Sorry

 

Today was one of those days when nothing was going right for me. Starting from breakfast when I spilled the milk and followed by morning commute ticket for speeding few miles per hour than the regular speed limit. Finally in office it was decided the project I was working for past few months where I put my heart and soul was cancelled. The top-level management thought that project would not be minting money so they just decided to shut it down. Honestly, I was really annoyed. I had sincerely worked my ass off and all of sudden they decided let's just call it quits. We were notified our developer team would be shuffled and we would be given a new project manager starting from tomorrow. The only positive from this project was some addition to my resume. Well but my resume did not need any addition if you think about it. I started with 8 years of experience.

           Heeding to the advice of my project manager I decided to go for yoga. In the parking lot some stupid person backed her car and hit my bumper. I was really angry at this point. I decided it was time to let it out and I started abusing "Fak you dumb tut tut." I hope it did not sound funny with my heavy accent though. I am not professional at these things. I came out of the car and went to check whom it was. She also came out of car and was actually a menacing figure as she was well built six footer. I swallowed few gulps of air as I did not know how to articulate further. All of the sudden the black women started crying. "Just kill me, I don't have insurance." I felt really bad and confused. I went to check on my car and it looked like there was hardly any damage. Her car was very old and beaten up.  I decided to take her phone number and information just in case. After everything that has happened I somehow decided to let it go. Besides I really needed to be on time for yoga class.

At first the word "Yoga" intimidated me. The only kind I knew were glimpses of Ramdev Baba on Astha channel many years ago. But who knew, Yoga studio is actually second best thing to strip club. Well in cases even better than that. Not that all the people who came here had rocking body but mostly evening classes would be packed with working class beautiful young women. To top it off Bikram yoga had extreme heat and humidity. It was pleasure seeing these young women sweat and bend their bodies. I really needed this break from monotony of this life. Although this form of yoga might be most berated and westernized form of yoga with copyrighted poses and setting somehow it worked for me and I liked it.

 I checked on the schedule and it was Dawn teaching today. Dawn was one of my favorite Yoga instructors, as unlike other yoga instructors she had no weird tattoos on her body. Her soothing voice was also comforting and complemented with difficult Yoga poses. For some reason I just hated big patchy tattoos on women's beautiful body. It is your body not walking coloring book.  I was delighted to see my class was filled with lots of beautiful girls and it excluded hairy dudes with baby pouch.

I had chosen a place close to the door because I could not handle extreme heat. Just as class was about to start a gorgeous blonde decided to take a spot in front of me blocking my view of the mirror. That meant I would be viewing her more often than usual. The class started off with regular breathing and stretching exercises. As class gradually progressed towards Pada-hasthana (also known as hands to feet Pose) I couldn't help but look at her hump, her lovely lovely lump. They were perfectly sized with right curvature, which would have made any sculptor proud. I really had to pace myself while ogling at her because I did not want to wake up little shark inside of me. I was blown away by her flexibility when she demonstrated herself in Standing Bow pose. I am not geometry Major but her legs were close to 180 degrees apart. Believe me folks Bikram Yoga is no joke. If you don't believe me, try it out for yourself. Pose after pose I was just drawn into her. At one time I felt she noticed me ogling at her. I kind of felt embarrassed at that point but even that did not stop me. I managed to gain enough courage to peek at her once again. It was during Standing Separate Leg stretching pose, she was supposed to put her hands along with her legs, instead she decided to shake her rear cheeks all by itself. It caused me to have minor heart attack and almost pop my eyes out. Due to this I made a mental note not to stare at her as much possible because I did not want to continue rest of my Yoga class with three legs. Rest of the class continued smoothly and we finally reached Kapalbhati (wind removing pose). I moved my mat little bit to the side in the earlier pose which meant I had good view of her in the mirror. While she was blowing wind out of her body her fruits of passion were jumping and bouncing as if they were crying out to be freed. Sadly that was the end of the Yoga class as everybody retreated to savasana(sleeping/dead pose).

Today was really an eventful day. I really need this class to bring peace and calm into my mind and body. Well let's just say mind for now. Usually at the end of the class I stay in savasana only for few minutes and then I shower and leave. But today I really decided to stay at it longer than usual. When I was woke up, it looked like everybody had already left. The front exit was already closed. I hurried back to take much needed shower as i was still profusely sweating. This Yoga studio actually had only two unisex showers for all Yogis and unisex changing room. Since I could hear some sound I assumed that someone was still there. I breathe sigh of relief and entered the shower. The cold water really felt nice on my skin and somehow my hands reached for the viscous snake that had risen its head. I was just enjoying my shower when suddenly I heard knock on my door. I did not know what to make of it. At first I thought I was just some random noise. But I heard it again. I quickly wrapped myself with a towel without a second thought I came out to see what it was about. There she was the same blonde who was standing in front of me in the yoga class. Before I could utter a word I noticed her mouth wide open. I looked at myself and my manhood was bulging out. Somehow my towel slipped out and next thing I knew was she was holding the weapon in her hand.

I was just about to say stop when she decided that it was delicacy she just had to taste it, so she put it into her mouth. I was just spellbound. The only sound I could make was that of ecstasy. She worked her tongue from tip to bottom just like a viper. Before too long she was riding me like in the rodeo in various positions. She looked really beautiful with blonde hair and soft white skin. I took a note of mole in around her nipple and reached for it. All of sudden she decides to smack me in face. "Don't disrupt my rhythm." That really infuriated me. I decided it was enough of women on the top and stretched her like a bow while one feet is in the ground the other feet in the air. I pounded her as hard as I could and with every stroke was sailed into eternal sea of bliss. As we reached the point of no return, I started to come to my senses. I have a wife at home. Wait wait stop. I even forgot to mention that. Too late.

The whole act lasted for approximately 15 minutes and we hurried back to our respective places. Slowly, guilt started to kick in. I did not know how to face my wife. I never really wanted something like this to happen. It was crime of passion. If I could, I would take this event and delete it from my life and memory. But damage has already been done.

I came home exhausted while my wife was waiting by the dinner table. It was really hard for me to face her for what I have done. But I had to act and pretend because I did not want to hurt her. I really do love her a lot. There is no way I could let this ruin our life. I promised myself I will bury this event in my memories and never again even entertain its thought. In my mind I knew I had messed up big time. She asked me what had happened and that I looked tired. I mentioned her of today's event except for the last part. I also told her about the black women backing up into my car. Before I could even explain that she cried and she had no insurance, she told me, "So you let her go right?  I know you more than you think." That was her response. I finished my dinner really quick and I requested I just want to sleep today. She was more than willing to let have my own space and tucked me to bed like a baby.

As I  closed my eyes to sleep, I did weep. Tears rolled out from my eyes. How could I be so dumb? What if that blonde had some kind of STD. I had risked so much now. I decided to schedule a test first thing  upon available date. I hoped my wife would not notice anything unusual in my behavior and take it as just a bad day.







I was woken up in the morning once again by my wife who did better job than my alarm, which I seem to snooze up every time. She had already made breakfast and my clothes ready for me. Her fluffy pancakes were better than Ihop or Denny’s. I thanked god for such a loving wife. I read through my morning emails and I headed to work. I made sure not to speed today. It was very important day for me as it meant a new beginning and new project. I turned to FM and surprisingly it was Robbie Williams. Most Americans that I know of have never heard of him. The lyrics just ripped my heart out as it played

As my soul heals through the shame
I will grow through this pain
Lord I'm doing all I can
To be a better man



I promised myself to be a Better man. I was just running through emotions but I needed to collect myself.


Our new team was introduced to one another which mostly consisted of all the old developers and the only major change we were told was new Project manager. While we were waiting in the conference room just like knights of round table, a blonde lady entered the room. To my horror she introduced us as our new project manager. It was the same lady that I had encountered yesterday in the Yoga studio. My troubles were instantly multiplied. I tried not to make any eye contact as much as possible with her until the meeting was over. As we left the room she kind of winked at me which sent shock waves through my mind.

As i walked towards my cubicle I made another mental note to never go to that yoga studio again. I was now starting to be visibly depressed. Following evening I went for a checkup and the physician their told me that for concrete result to appear that I was free of STDs and HIV negative it would take about 2 weeks at least.

Somehow I need to protect my wife, as I did not want to risk her life. I had to avoid sexual contact with her for at least next week. In the evening while I sat by the dinner table i had to manufacture lie about headache and sickness. She asked me about the new project. Somehow words slipped out and I happen to mention that I saw my new project manager in Yoga studio earlier. But later I backtracked saying that I had seen her only once there. I just wished that she would not notice that something was usual.

Days passed by, I tried to avoid contact with my Project manager as much as possible unless it was necessary. I did not want to hint that I had some kind of feelings towards her. Worst part was that I could not even speak about it to her. She also did a good job acting as if nothing had happened. I tried to also make sure that I was married by letting her know indirectly by putting my wife's pic in my cubicle and flashing my ring as much as possible. While all these thoughts were going on I was also working my ass off in this new project. My job was also heavily dependent on it. My physical health did also take some beating. I don't know if it had to do with my guilt or my acting prowess.

Finally result came out and it was told I was free of an STDs and HIV negative. But this was not time for me to rejoice. Tonight I made up my mind to give my wife all I had. We finally made love after so many days. It was the best I ever had and very natural. Usually when we are done, I don't spend much time chit chatting with her and go straight to bed. Today i really wanted to spend more time with her.

We were just talking about our family members in Nepal and suddenly she posted me a strange question about my work. She asked me when will my project  be complete and what would happen if new project manager would come in. I did not think about it much and just answered the question as it. My project would at least need another 3 weeks for completion and if new project manager would come between it would be a disaster. That was my answer to her.

Today I noticed that my wife had also become slimmer than image I had of her in my mind. I said you look so good tonight. It was very unusual of me to complement after the act but I did so tonight.

Days once again passed on as project progressed, we were behind the scheduled release but we were not off by much. Thankfully nothing bad happened meanwhile. I prayed to God each and everyday that I will never make such mistakes in life. Finally,  just a day before release tragedy strikes. Our project manager is brutally murdered in robbery attempt.

I was shocked by this news. She was really nice person. Although we made a mistake, she never tried to take any advantage of her position. I just hope that along with her, even our deepest and darkest secret was buried.

Our project was a huge success and I even got a huge bonus for this work. My wife and me were getting along really well. But somewhere inside of me guilt was really killing me. I needed forgiveness for my mistake. We were in fact even planning to have a baby now. Finally guilt was just too much for me to take. I decided I will confess to her about my sins. I could never start a family on the premises of lie. I had to come clean. But I needed a good timing.

One day while watching TV, news about Lance Armstrong was being aired. I asked her if Lance Armstrong could be forgiven. She replied," He has lied multiple times, I cannot forgive him." I really thought it was bad timing for me to put forward this issue. There was big pause. "What if I made some silly mistake? Will you forgive me?" She replied, "I will forgive you only once."

I thought for a moment and decided it was time to confess. "I have made a mistake in life. Can you forgive me?"

I was hoping for her to be angry or surprised. But she looked at me and instead put another question at me. "What if I said you same thing? Will you forgive me."

Initially I thought she was joking but her words were thought provoking. I had to process these thoughts with heavy burden. What if she was also doing something behind my back? I trusted her. I believed in her. With a smile on my face I said," I would have forgiven you."

She said "Ok. Are you sure?"

I replied, "100 percent."

She said, " What is your mistake?"

I confessed my encounter with my project manager. Tears once rolled down my cheek. I begged her not to leave me. I promised I would never make such mistake again.

"I forgive you. Please do not make such mistake again."

I cried and hugged her. Then suddenly it came to my mind what could be her mistake.

"What about you?"

"Sorry, I had to correct your mistake. I could not see you bothered and tensed. I took care of your dirty little secret."

 

 

Good read, vasudev.

If you have a wife who doesn't make pancakes better than IHOP or Denny's, you should find a new beau though (jk jk). One question, what does she mean when she says " I took care of your dirty little secret?" Did she cheat on him? (That is what I assumed at least)

Good one!
I guess, wife killed her husband's manager.

Little inpired by the movie "Unfaithful." But I  loved it.

good story and presentation.

Nice read vasu. Thoroughly enjoyed it.

I also gussed her wife killed her project manager.

Good job enjoyed reading

" I took care of your dirty little secret" - climax is a cherry on top. Good Job.

 wow. Story was gritty and kept me on my toes till the very end.

 Awesome!

thank you  @annehathaway,@phatte,@mangale,@adventurer,@serial,@intelligentguy,@chromatic,@purweli,@hover_over and all those who liked, commented or read my posts. I am glad i could entertain you guyz. I wil keep writing. Your feedback and reviews are highly appreciated.

 Nice job Fabio.

I read all the kudos about your story. Hope you won't mind my "cricitism."

As I was reading the story, it felt like the theme/subject of the story was chosen to garner more audience. The story is successful in doing so: I guess there's nothing wrong with that. The adult content is an integral part of the story, although the detail could've been spared but it is on the writer's discretion-again, no harm in that.

The twist of the story gives it a nice touch; however the ending is almost predictable.

Not a bad try. Keep them coming.

 I have a very different view from Kiddo.

If you've read any of Vasudev's stories, his themes are centered around mature adult contents. In that sense, this is no different. So I cannot hold against him for writing similar content and say he's tried to garner more audience this time.

And, I for one, found the ending UNpredictable. This could be due to my focus on the mature content itself, but then, that makes the ending even more successful from a writer's perspective.

 I never thought you would write so well, keep up the good work :) 

for a person like me, if i find smth very repetitive and boring, i skip few lines and i had to do it couple of times-- i hope you'd take it as a contructive criticism but then it can just be me. I liked the part where you linked every part of the story without skipping it.. ( Few ppl do that) 

Keep writing!!

AT the end, u kept us wondering.. " what did she do to take care of his dirty little secret"..

Nice one!!