Hi folks,
I am a Nepalese and in love with an Indian girl. I came as a student in the US. We took some classes together, and I was not serious in the beginning. I felt that she likes me. We used to see each other in the library, cafeteria, and in the school yard. I thought I could have some physical with her while in college, then leave. She was fast forward. One day she invited me to her apartment to help her with the maths. Her roomate had a class at that time, so we were only two. We studied together and I felt at one point that she is asking for it. Then I also grabbed her pomegranates and went on... This has been going for a while now. Now, I feel that I love her and want to marry her. Her family lives in the city, two hours away from the college. I have even met her parents once in a while during weekends. Her family seems to be cool with a Nepalese son-in-law. But my parents won't. I can convince them though. But, will this relationship be good thinking of a long-term? They are Indian, and we Nepalese. The language barrier, small cultural differences between the two families. Does it matter? When we have kids, it will be more complicated. I'm confused what to do. I thought I could leave easily but that's not going to happen. Has anybody been happily married with Indians?

There are plenty of Nepali chelibetis married to Indian dudes (much to dismay of Nepali torilaures, I reckon). Why wouldn't your parents accept her? In most cases, cultural difference  - religion and caste in most cases,  is what plays as the barrier in a relationship. Since she's an Indian, you should be good to go. This will bring more good than bad, imho. Talk to your parents openly. Since you're already in the states, they might warm up to the idea. 


Also, pomegranates, really? I know you didn't mean to disrespect her but perhaps the mannerism could've been different. We don't need to know details about your raslila. 

That said, I don't think you're gonna get momo banaune bhanda as dowry since Indians don't do momos kyare. 

whoa, chill people,
I am by no means disrespecting her by how it went. I just narrated the story so that you guys can know the scenario is. She is ok with all this. Btw, she, once in a while talks about her white and back boyfriends while in high school when she gets mad with me. This really annoys me and makes me think if I should marry her or not. We already broke up three times and patch up again.

there only exist two ppl, grl and a boy, man a woman, and its all upto ppl to bring issues of this issues, otherwise its okay for man to marry woman.

friends for benefit.. enjoy!!!

 Yup thats right you are not getting momo pakaune vada for dowry for sure. Apart from that you are all set to move ahead. But as I said do get words from your parents too as in our culture we are not separable from them until the very end so life will be easy and happy if you have both parents and love in your life.
By the way you can buy momo pakaune vada in china town if you need it later.

Marrying an Indian?????????
No f*ing way... yesto ta shatru lai pani nahos..... LOL

Just joking...

Seriously dude, who cares....I have seen countless people marrying white guys/gals and living a harmonous life together. Like everyone else is saying, the most important thing is the love and RESPECT.... Natural ups/downs aside, if love & respect is not there...you should move on even in the relationship between jhapali and banepali. It's not worth it. Otherwise, all I can see from YOUR posting that...you two are 'manufactured' for each other...

Seal the deal.

have you guys talked about getting married yet? has she given you any hints , about marriage? sounds likes he's raised here, i would advise to treat her as someone who has born and raised here although you might think she's Indian because of her looks but from deep down she migh have caucasion values.

@pshrestha,
she was born in india but raised in the US. She is more American than Indian. She isn't serious about marriage yet, may be she is still too young. She is weird sometimes; she asks me for her own space and doesn't see me for a week. I don't know if she is committed to me or not. But, i think i love her.

Why did she ask you for own space?. Does she work in NASA or something?. Lolz just kidding. Buddy it seems you are not even sure if she will marry you, so why are you even worried about marriage now. Better count the chickens after they are hatched. She sounds like some effort, if i were you, i had stay away from marriage with such a girl. LOLZ but all the best to you anyways.

@freedom,
According to her, we need to date more often for few more years and then we think about marriage. She says we need to know each other and find out if we are best for each other. She is caring and sweet except a few times. When i get sick, she leaves her errands and takes care of me, like taking care of food, medicines and rest. Her past doesn't bother me at all coz I was also in love with a hooker before.I am a one woman man now. I love her sweet nature a lot especially the caring part. Some of her friends don't like me cause I don't look at them and praise them or their dress. I got a hint that one of them told my girl that I love her for green card. F*k that. I aint worried about that piece of paper. I don't even want to stay in the US. I got enough money that I can live my whole life just sitting and my kids by sleeping. But, she knows I am in love with her not paper. She cares less about that. She is just 20, and got all the curves. I dunno if she is a right girl but she is right for me.

And, thanks everybody for replying. I have read and liked each one of your posts.

 I had one too...I gotta tell ya... indian girls are very kinky...I guess they got this built up sex in them from years...So, she pretty  much tried every fantasy and kinks she had . When she asked for the marriage..I said hell no...So she got married to another Indian dude.. :) 
I never loved her so I wasnt gonna marry her.

 Not a big dea,  If you want to marry her marry her and then if things don't work outr later do divorce, thats the way it goes in western culture and seems like your girlfriend is Indian American no matter she was born in india, so there is no way that you will be stuck with her like in our Nepali culture.

बाउ आमाको मुख हेरेर बस्नेले मायाप्रिती लगाउनु अघि स्वीकृति लिनु पर्दैन ?  You are not confused but trying to make other confused. 

अप्रिल फुल : मनाउन तयार गरिएको धागो, बिगतमा पनि यस्तै धागो देखिएको थियो |  

Last kiss,

she was raised here since childhood and you came to US after high school. The issues between you guys are the values. Your value may be more traditional (hindu) since you spent your childhood in Nepal and her values seem to be American although she is from an Indian family and was born in India.

You should have already noticed some of her red flags that may hinder the success and continuity of your perspective marriage.  You guys already had 3 break up. She disappears for a week and said she needs some space. She has not even thought about the marriage seriously yet. I don't think that you will like her talking about her white or other boy friends in her high school after marriage. It doesn't bother you now because she is just your girl friend now, not wife. If she doesn't hesitate to talk about them now, she may not hesitate to talk them possibly even after marriage.

 You think that you are truly in love with her. You also might have thought that you were truly in love with that hooker at that time but now you realized  you were not. I like the facts that you are very open about your life story with us. So, I wanna suggest something to you. Although you think that you are deeply in love with her, it may be just the infatuation that goes away after a while. If you really wanna enjoy the harmonious marriage, marry a traditional ( hindu) educated girl from Nepal. She will never say that she had a number of boyfriends in her school and never disappear saying that she needs some space. That's the beauty of Nepalese girl who honestly and traditionally take care her husband and marriage until the last minute. I am saying all that from my personal experience. Good luck with your decision bro.

 @nepali lahure,

I liked your comment. I felt that you understood me exactly. I can't just leave her like a cold turkey and marry a Nepal, Hindu, educated girl. Actually, I don't like educated Nepali girls at all especially their tantrums and career oriented mindset. Anyway, lets see how out relationship goes? Thanks all for commenting.

talk to your family and ask yourself there is no solid answer for your case. its entirely depends on various factors, categorized each and what is most important in your life then take a decision.
gyani bana babu badhi halla khalla haina

I completely agree with what Nepali Lahure said. This is probably just an infatuation. You can still date the girl but I don't think you should marry her. Nothing against her background, religion, and nationality, I just don't think this relationship is going to be beneficial to both sides in long term. You guys already broke up and patched up multiple times, and you said she still threatens with her ex boyfriends. If she was brought up in India, maybe things could have been different. But from what I see, you seem to be a more traditional guy and she is completely westernized (not her fault). If a girl still brings up her ex boyfriends, then that is a sign to not move forward in that relationship.

last kiss: does she love you truly or is it just inflatuation? I might be wrong but this is something you must find out first. You said she was born here but be careful in taking any indecisive decision since getting married with a right girl and a girl who value who you are matters the most. Looking from the point of you, she wants to learn more about you or may be looks like she is not acting fast about marriage loks like that why she wants you to date more but she wants to observe you for a year that can be a red flag.
Take right decision before getting married, if both of you think alike or respect each other get married but before doing that do some homework and know what you want.

Best wishes

मरेपछि ओखति ! The original post was 3 years old.