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 STEER IT UP.......
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Posted on 01-29-07 10:29 PM     Reply [Subscribe]
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Everyone has their own views about a topic or in this case a story...lot of times what writer writes needs a lot more finishing...here i am trying to create an opportunity for every one to add what they feel about where this story should be heading.

I wrote the first part of it and would want the others to write the rest of it...lets see where you want to take the characters in the story....

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

“Priyanka, I am going for lunch” Aditya said in his usual careless way.

Aditya, a good looking guy, not very well built but has worked hard enough to be in shape. He has never cared about others, but is always the center of attention among his friends and the life of any party. Parties cannot begin without him, is what his friends think. “Is Aditya coming?” is the first question if you want to invite ladies to the party. He is always like a Sun in solar system. He is very well knows for his romantic personality and uncountable affairs.
His father Mr. Misra is a famous surgeon in the country and also abroad. 5 out of his 12 months he is traveling around the globe, either for seminar, as a visiting professor or in most occasions for some complicated surgery. Earns tons of money, much more than needed for a family of 5 and bunch of servants. Basically, Aditya was born with a silver spoon in his mouth. He has always got what he wanted or even more, always did what he wanted to do. Every thing he did was supported by his family, financially and morally as well.
He went to school in Darjeeling, as all rich people do, to get so called better education, and thus thinks he is the best educated person. He also has degrees from abroad though. He went to Europe for higher education after he completed his high school from India. He had money to afford to go to different places and also traveled with his father to many different countries.
A very reputed family in the country and well known personality among his friend belongs to Aditya.

Priyanka looked at him and continued her work.

Priyanka, a decent girl with a god gifted look was born and raised in a typical middle class family. The eldest of all, had lot of expectation from her parents and younger sisters as well. Her only brother, youngest of 4 was loved by every one, thus was spoiled child. Her father was about to retire from his government job. And mere pension was, barely enough for them to support financially. She had responsibility over her family over her younger sisters, the responsibility to educate them, the responsibility to lead them and the responsibility to guide them the right way.
Priyanka went to one of the boarding schools in the valley. Not one of the top, but good enough to provide her a good education and a stable career. She has pretty good career as well. Working in a private company as marketing personnel is not bad at all. She earns well enough to support her family at the moment. She has shown her working ability as an employee.
Like every girl, she has a dream a dream to find a perfect guy, who would understand her feeling, her ups and downs. A guy who is by her side when she needs him, a person who can guide her when needed, a guy who could make her feel secured. She is no different than any of her friends, but she has responsibility towards her family before she can think of anything else.

She was in love, a long time ago. When she was in school, but the responsibility towards her family and the pressure of being the eldest in the family shattered her dream. Since then she is completely devoted to her family, never thought about her dreams, but could not get out of it either. It is buried somewhere in her heart, the pressure from closed and conservative society like our, could easily pull that out from the coffin.

‘When are you going for lunch, Aavas’ her question to Aavas.
‘We can go together’ a quick reply from Aavas with a smile.

Aavas; another employee in the same company. He has been working in the company for a while. He is a computer major, but also has Accounting background, so mostly works with accounting packages. Old school calls him accountant, but does not work with ledgers and journal vouchers. Not a hardcore accountant, but spends good enough time with accounts.
He was born and raised in modern, yet upper middle class family. Financially not so weak, he is fond of working. His dad owns a company, an export company that exports handicrafts to various European countries and US. He is there to learn something. Always eager to learn, Aavas has learned a lot from his present work. He wants to expand the business his dad started, so is always willing to work on any field and has never said NO to any thing. He has been favorite among all his co-workers and his boss, the owner and CEO of the company Mr. Singh loves him as his own son. He has been able to create a room for himself in the company.
As of today, if he leaves that company, there are tons of clients that would follow him and leave the company. They are in there because of Aavas, and they only deal with Aavas. Aavas, represents company for them, they don’t care about the CEO, not about the anyone else.
Aavas, a highly professional, softspoken and the loved one of all, studied in very reputed School in the valley, got his MBA from KCM and his Computer degree from PU. He is all about making friends, and being loved. Every one loved him, wherever he went. His friends love him, his professors ignored his mistakes (if he made any), his seniors respect him and his co-workers can’t work without him. A perfect friend and an employee with very high level of professionalism is Aavas.
In these 5 years with the company, he has been very successful to separate his personal life with professional life. He lives with a theory, ‘personal life should be separate from professional life’ and he would do any thing to keep it separate.

Life always doesn’t take people the way they want to go…

‘Aavas, lets go for lunch…’ Prianka’s voice distracts Aavas.

Aavas’ theory of life…he himself crossed the fine line he created…not knowing he already did…or may be lunch with Prianka was a personal life…he won’t be at work at that time…

There is something about the lunch time, that makes him eager, his table clock gets stared in every 5 mins…if it be a possibility, he would change the speed of time…he would run the time until lunch and keep it still…stop it…bring the world to a hault…

‘Kata jaaney?’ Aavas asked Priyanka…
‘Same thaau jaaney ni hunna…??’ Priyanka suggested a place
Both of their favorite place was Gazabko, located at Kamalpokhari, on Marcopolo Business Hotel. She loves their chicken salad sandwich and coffee.

Both of them get there and place an order…a very cozy environment at Gazabko is really very impressive, and service is not bad either…but surprises is the way to live…expect the unexpected…

‘Timi haru pani yeta…hi honey…’Aditya tried to address both but immediately ignored Aavas.

Aavas did not like the later part…but didn’t say anything, just smiled.

‘I was bored by myself…do you mind if I join you…I believe not…’ he invited himself and accepted it immediately.
‘Bhai…mero order yehi table maa lyaaideu hai…’(can you bring my order to this table)

Aditya…he has a very outstanding skill…making friends, he can blend himself in any kinda situation, he has that tone, people always like, a very good sense of humor.

Aavas in the other hand is kinda reserved. He thinks before he says something, he thinks about the consequences, results and if someone gets hurts of his words. Sensitive person is what would be a better word to describe him.

Aditya started to talk about his Europe tour…how he was busted in Germany…how many bars did he visited in The Netherlands…how he ran away from Boarding while in India…his life was full of interesting incidents…every day he gets into some incidents.

Aditya would make jokes of his own life and incidents…Priyanka would laugh at it…Aavas would just smile at them

‘So…Priyanka where did you say, you live again ???’ he threw a question at her

‘Kupondol…’ one word answer

‘Where about in Kupondol...???’ Aditya asked again

‘Hanuman mandir bata bhitra jaanu parcha, alikati…’ Priyanka replied

‘Do you know that place..???’ Priyanka asked after a pause

‘Ooh yea, I was born in kathmandu…I have to know the places’ he carelessely answerd

Through the entire lunch, Aavas was quiet…just smiling and nodding his head...didnot say much.
Days were passing by…they’d go for lunch together…three of them…Aditya, not a popular name among clients and his superiors is the center of attention on the floor though. He makes everyone laugh…his superb sense of humor has make him known among his colleagues.

One fine morning, he came to work…

!!!Attention everyone!!!

‘Its my birthday today, if u forgot…’ He started
‘I’ve organized a little party for all my friends…and all you are invited…’ he continued
‘…And I’ll come to pick you up…’ he said to Priyanka walking
 
Posted on 01-29-07 10:30 PM     Reply [Subscribe]
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‘I’ve organized a little party for all my friends…and all you are invited…’ he continued
‘…And I’ll come to pick you up…’ he said to Priyanka walking closer to her.



(Reposting for typo)
 
Posted on 01-29-07 10:40 PM     Reply [Subscribe]
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i will manage sometimes tomorrow to go through and comment
 
Posted on 01-31-07 6:04 PM     Reply [Subscribe]
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Priyanka was taken by surprised; dumbstruck she stood there. She hasn't expected anyone to pick her up to their parties; actually she never went to parties. She didn't know how to answer right at that moment, but as soon as Aditya get passed of her. she remained jaded there.
Aavaas was just around the corner and have overheard the picking up part.
All these years of lunch together, He was yet to ask her for anything outside the office, He had liked her in his own way!! He was too afraid to mingle his feelings with his colleague, yet afraid not to mingle them!!He stood there, dumbstruck; more than Priyanka herself as if volcano was going to burst up right there!!
They gathered around the same place; same time same order!
Chicken sandwich, mo: mo:, chicken chowmein over the two cups of coffee and a glass of Sprite!!
"Aadityaji, yeuta kura bahnchhu narisaunus hai!" Priyanka started teh conversation.
"hajur bhannus!"
" Ma aaja aundina hai!!" Priyanka gave her verdict!!
Aavash got delighted, didn't showed that in his face, Aaditya had no problem but showed sadness in his face;
then spoke,
" Then I will cancel the party!!"
Now, that become unexpected for Priyanka!! Somebody so popular canceling the whole party for her! There was no other way around and she could not disagree.
"Ok, I will come, but U don't need to pick me!!"
Aavash was half heart broken, but he had to be at party.
Aaditya had one more mission accomplished. She will be there and his game will continues on!!

P.S.- Please continue I can't write more!!..:p
Harku, Nice one there!!..:D
 
Posted on 02-01-07 12:12 AM     Reply [Subscribe]
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Juggy raja... :-) nice work lets get it from others as well
 
Posted on 02-01-07 11:20 AM     Reply [Subscribe]
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Although terribly disappointed about aaditya having the chance to continue the game with priyanka he was slightly happy that she was not accepting aaditya's offer to be picked up. The more he thought about it the more happy he became.

He kept on thinking, that he also had the chance to talk to her and maybe even tell her his feelings towards her. By the end of the day he was delighted at the thought of priyanka. He started thinking of possibilities that maybe ..just maybe that she had very little interest on aaditya and she might be interested in him instead.

He was looking forward to seeing Priyanka somewhere else other than the same job everyday. He was visioning her ..the way she would walk..what she would wear.. The thoughts made him smile. He started to wonder...how he would make himself talk to her. As you know, he is more of a reserved type and he can't say things that are in his mind. He had never been able to talk to her comfortably in front of others especialy when it came to his feelings.

He went up to the mirror, to fix up the tie. The thought of him dancing with her..made him so happy. Then the nervousness striked...As he stood there, he looked at himself and began thinking that there was NO chance to compete with Aaditya, who is so sauve. He thought of the scene where he was barely about to talk to Priyanka, Aaditaya came and swept her to the dance floor.

ok...that's it...
i am bored :-D

Good one Harke :-)
 
Posted on 02-01-07 2:57 PM     Reply [Subscribe]
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"Daddy, i have to go to this birthday party... i wont be long" Priyanka says to her dad. " Okay dear but please dont be late, time is not right these days" her dad replied. She was not asked any question as she was a grown-up girl and her dad knew she could take care of herself. "Dont worry daddy, it will be just for an hour or so...." saying that Priyanka goes up to her room to change.

Aavass, all dressed-up, ready to leave, thinks may be he should give her a call and ask if he could pick her up. But he wasn't sure...
Then the phone rings... " Hello..." Aavass answers
"Aavass, hi !, this is Priyanka" the voice from the other end.
suddenly Aavass was delighted.., "Hi Priyanka.. ",
"Aavass, can we go together to the party, i dont feel comfortable to go alone".
Aavass's heart-beat jumps to 80... he could speak for a moment... he imagines the look on the Aaditaya's face..
Priyanka waiting on the other end " hello! Aavass, are you there??? hello!! "
" yeah yeah i am here, sorry for that... sure we will go together.. what time should i pick you?" Aavass replies with excitemet.
"I will be ready in an half hour so.. if you could please...." Priyanka says with a soft voice
" sure sure.. i will be at your house in half hour"
"Thank you aavass... bye, see you in a while" hangs up the phone.

Aavass could not believe it was for real.. Priyanka actually asked him to pick her up.. Aavass lives in Pulchowk so it would take him about 10mins to get to her home. He couldnt stop staring at his watch. He dont want to be there early but he doesnt want to be late too. Exactly after 10mins he leaves the house and takes the cab. since he is there little early, he waits couple of mins in the cab then walks to the door. He hits the door bell..
a little girl opens
" Nanu, Priyanka didi ...... " asks with really soft voice
" Priyanka didi, hajur ko sathi aauna bhacha " yells running inside the house

Aavass stood in the door, confused if he should step in or not ! and then... in a min.. Priyanka comes down the stairs.
She wore a long light-blue dress, her hair was loose, she had a light make-up and dark kajal on.
Aavass had never seen her like that.. he couldnt talk, he was freezed up...
" You look good Aavass" says Priyanka with a little smile
" thanks... you look amazing" replies Aavass
" Shall we" says Priyanka and they leave for the Party.

(pls ignore if you find any typo ) :) interesting haha
 
Posted on 02-03-07 4:37 PM     Reply [Subscribe]
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They reached at the party!!
Party had already started, although they were not late!
Ambient light; slow music, known and unknown guest and a fine bar!! The party was more than perfect!!
"Priyankaaaa!!I thought I will have to scare all my guests away if u would not have come!!" Aaditya welcomed them!! And Priyanka blushed!
"And you look wonderfully gorgeous!!" He added completely ignoring Aavas!!
Aavaas wanted to ignore all of this but some fume was already in his face!
"Can't I get a birthday hug!!" Aavas could only stare at Aaditya now!!
And Priyanka has no answer!! She stood there all blushed and confused!
And Aaditya felt the inconvinience:
"Saato gaayo ho?? I am not that bad either!!" Aaditya winced at Priyanka.
"No, testo hoina!!" Priyanka had to answer.
"I was kidding!!" Aaditya knew the game.
He turned to Aavas," Enjoy the party! I will be back!!" and he turned to other guests.
Aavas turned to Priyanka, " Anything to drink??"
"A cola!"
Aavas went to the bar to get the drinks. and returned with two colas, He was not a drinker anyways!
Aavas was in turmoil of the situations, and wanted to struck a meaningful dialogue. He searched for words, but he had turned numb. All He can do was stare at Priyanka!!
She stood there gorgeous as never before, and silent with thousand words!
Aavas searched to find some words and all that came out was,
"Priyanka"
Priyanka looked at her,'hajur'
He had no other word and He can't make any either but founda better excuse:
"Can I get u anything?" He cursed at his own dumbness!!
" Pardaina!" Priyanka smiled, taking every part of his heart away!
Aaditya came out of nowhere,
"Come on Aavas, its my B day man, kahan cola khairaako!!" He went to bar to get the drinks. He came back with two whiskies.
Aaditya usually avoided drinks, and only took little of it. But He could not refuse when someone was requesting.
The background started playing a slow jazz.
"Can I dance with you??" Aaditya asked Priyanka.
Priyanka could not say no!!
And they danced slowly in the music. Aavaas was looking for another drink!! One was not enough.

Ok I have enough now!! Rest of you take on!!..:P
 
Posted on 02-03-07 5:37 PM     Reply [Subscribe]
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He went and sat at the bar...and asked for another whiskey. He started drinking slowly as he watched them danced. He was very envious of Aaditya... He was cursing himself for not being able to ask her to dance ...or even make some sort of conversation for that matter. As he sipped his whiskey, he started noticing that he was staring at priyanka only. Sometimes he would catch her glancing at this way and he would look the other way. He didn't want her to the wrong idea. He was admiring her graceful ways, the way she moved.. He had completely forgotten about Aaditya there with her, instead he had started to fantasize dancing with her.

Then the slow song came, and realized that she was in his arms. She glanced his way and caught him staring at her. When he realized she had noticed, he turned toward the bar. While avoiding her eyes, he caught Aaditya's and he could see the smirk in his face. Annoyed he turned to get more whiskey. There was another lady by the bar as well right next to him sipping some drink.. She smiled as he turned...noticing that he was caught offguard. While fantasizing, he hadn't noticed Preeti had come by and sat next to him. He didn't know preeti well, she was a freind of a friend and had only met couple of time before.

He drank the next shot of whiskey quick and asked preeti to the dance floor thinking this might make priyanka jealous. He wasn't thinking quite clearly at this point. He just wanted to do something to take his mind off her and enjoy the party.
He realized later that even then it was not possible. Even as he danced with preeti, he kept watching from time to time in their direction. He wanted to just go in and ask her to dance. But how?? he didn't know how he could make himself do that...

Stumped once again!! He just continued dancing with preeti. She was a great dancer, he hadn't realized that until this moment. She asked him, " So!! are you interested in her? "
Aavas was stunned for a moment. "Umm What do you mean?" He tried his best to play it cool, but he facial expression gave it all away. He wasn't good at faking things. Preeti giggled and said " Ahh right!!" and just smiled. As she danced, she continued... "aren't you two good friends?" He smiled and said..." yeah we're friends. "

Song was over and they moved toward the bar. He noticed, they were still dancing. This was the third songs, he wondered "aren't they tired!! why don't they take a break!!" He cursed at Aaditya as he walked to the bar for more drink... Preeti followed behind him clearly interested in his story ... Hearing aavas curse...Playfully preeti said "cursing huh?!! and smiled" He turned red...he hadn't noticed she was right behind. As they both got another drink... She added " instead of cursing ... why don't you cut in and ask her to dance ? "

He had thought of so many ways to ask her but all the practiced out versions had turned out bad. He didn't think he had the nerve to go and ask her. Clearly the first attempt at a conversation had turned out miserable. Preeti noticed right away his problems... Aavas was lost in thoughts again...had completely forgotten about her question.
 
Posted on 02-03-07 9:38 PM     Reply [Subscribe]
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He asked her and got his heart broken.
Then suddenly a meteor crashed at their party and they died happily ever after.

THE END

=)
 


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