I have heard many instances of Nepali guys in the US or Canada going to Nepal to get married. Then, they apply for visa for the wife and it gets denied, or possibly takes 5 to 10 years.

The married guy comes back to the US and at tries to see what he can do to get the wife to the US. The US immigration being what it is, once it's denied there's no way out of it. So what ends up happening is the just married girl has to remain in Nepal waiting forever while the guy is already starting to get back into his swing of life in the US as a single guy.

I have seen many girls despairing in Nepal after this kind of episodes. The guy on the other hand scored a nice honeymoon out of all this, while the girl is suffering for god knows how many years. She can't even have a normal life anymore.

The educated guys from US should stop exploiting such girls in Nepal and stop screwing up their lives. Unless you have a US citizenship, you very well know that it could take years to get the girl in the US so stop knowingly screwing up a girl's life.

I have few families in Nepal who married off thier daughters to these US returned guys and now the lives of the whole family is in turmoil. The parents are regretting the whole thing. The daughters are torn between living in the guys house or their own house. Not being able to have normal life.

 exploiting?? Maybe the girl or her family shouldn't agree to the marriage unless the guy can secure a future for the couple overseas... or unless the guy agrees to move back for the sake of couple's future. In which case, I think there would be no marriage to begin with. 

OMG this is so true. One of my best friends is going through this same thing. The guy was a nice guy on H1 visa he said it would be easy to get spouse visa. People living in Nepal who haven't travelled much are a bit naive so they thought it would be easy to get the visa since the guy was working for a good company. Now 3 years into the marriage my friend is still in Nepal going through rough emotional time. They are having fights in skype every time. It is probably not going to work out. Such a waste of everything.

 Sorry for your friend but I'm not sure if you can blame the guy either. He probably heard or saw that it is easier to bring the spouses for H1-Bs which I think is true for most cases...but there definitely seems to be exceptions to this rule. I think it is good that they at least fight with each other which means that the guy is not indifferent towards her. They just need to figure out something to stay toghether.

I agree. We should know better than to destroy a life like that, as in our culture, it could be difficult for the girl back home, like the OP has pointed out.

Marriage is a union, staying apart is not a union. It is frustrating for the girl. Why make life so complicated. All guys should take this into consideration.

I agree with the original poster. Nepali guys should not take this kind of thing lightly and contribute such problems. Theeviltwin are you planning to go to Nepal to get married on your H1 visa?

 nobody said I was on H1 visa.

Your post might hold for an arrange marriage but it is not true for love marriage.
If a girl and a boy chose their partners themselves, there should be no blame game. If its a true love they should understand and wait. अलग भएर बस्नु केटाको पनि बाध्यता हो रहर होईन !!

It can work the other way around too. I have heard of some stories where a girl got married to a guy and came to the is through the marriage and then left the guy after comin to the US for another guy or sometimes to 'reunite' with her boyfriend who was already in the US.
I don't think of the scenario described by the originatoe as exploitation as long it is done with a good faith.

I agree with the agony the girl and her family has to go through. It's not easy...especially the girl being torn apart in living...parental home or her 'new home'. 

It is true that the guys have to be considerate for the consequences that girl/family have to suffer. They should not do that.

Now, let's go little deeper here. Why such relations are even established? In arrange marriages, why just because the guy lives in the west, no matter how enslaved condition, it appears that he is an immidiate match. How come? Are families still that dumb that they are taking a that risk just to see their daughters in an 'idea american' life style?

Therefore, my conviction is that the guy is at fault, but even before that the girl herself and mainly her family is at fault. 

It can work other way round but come on, Nepali girls are tender and raised in a male dominated society, so it is very difficult for them. This is true for majority of the nepali girls. 

I believe in arranged marriage as an ok custom that i respect but sometimes it goes too far. It is sad that nepali families still think that just coming to usa makes for a great life for their kids whereas the fact could be very different for many. Many struggle over here even well educated ones. 

 

Ya Nepalese in Nepal  r naive, Nepalese from West can literally brainwashed them. But it's the fault of bride n her family not doing research n finding out who is legit like who has s citizenship. Even Green card holder takes lots of process n time to get their spouse into West. I know some guy who is out of status n have been living since 12 years, n a woman with greencard in another state. Since he has made lots of money n sent Nepal, their families decided to marry them. The guy went to girls state lying he also has a green card. Between several meetings the guy took her to a motel n had sex. He was bragging how he screwed that girl. When the girls family found out he had no greencard, he fled back to the state where he was living.
    I agree with Yuvaraj, i ve heard an incident where this guy goes to Nepal, gets married n bring his wife. His wife was sleeping with his fren. The bitch now is with the lover. The irony is that she put bhaitika on that guy. Later on pictured surfaced abt that bitch n guy kissing on facebook. So it's difficult to say who is right n wrong. I don't find Nepalese woman attractive so i don't want to marry them n face problems. American girls r cool, they don't wana get married before dating at least 3 yrs n they easily break up n gone, no tension, no jhamela. Anyways Nepali girls r crazy, i ve seen another one sleeping with her bhaitika brother n then there was this girl sleeping with her roomate when she has a boyfren in another state. People think westerners r sluts but i find Nepali girls more slutty than them.
      Further i have no respect for Nepali bitches, they r occupied with career n future. They want guys with greencards n good job no matter how ugly that guy is. Most of them r golddiggers. But American girls they really dun care abt your family background, caste, race n what kinda job u have. Bravo!

 that is another thing I don't understand in Nepalese culture. The concept of "brother"..How in the world can a male and a female be "siblings" and resist sexual tension if not related by blood?? 

Both parties should be considered equally guilty. The decision of walking down the aisle and saying "I do" for someone who lives in the US whilst taking the 'waiting period' too lightly is as stupid as it gets. It's not uncommon to hear about spouses living in Nepal having affairs or couples growing apart due to frustrations created due to uncertain waiting timeframe (A perm resident's spouse won't get her visa for 3-6 years while the timeframe for a Citizen can be 4-14 months). Hence, it's always best to sit down and weigh in on other available options - only getting engaged, applying for student visas first etc. 

On a different note, it could be worse - I've heard of Indian men who're already married in the US going to India to get hitched only for dowry. Hopefully, that's not a normal trend among Nepalese. 

i agree with gori ko poi this time

Thanks Texasranger

Gorikopoi, it's not surprising to see you posting some nonsense on here. I mean, lets be real, you tend to talk out of your ass most of the time but this time around, you clearly went overboard with your generalization prompting me to ask a few questions - What went wrong in your upbringing? Was it wrong parenting or schooling? Or were you simply born with an IQ of 63.09833? 

yetra ko thanks khate...ta [Disallowed String for - use not allowed] lai ta bhete bhane tero chala nikalera lauchu and i will make sure you watch me wear it

@Freedom, that is highly presumptuous of you to protray all the Nepalese girls as 'tender and naive'. I convict that they are exactly the opposite.

The ONLY ones from 'neo-modern' class so eager about an American jwai or '(bhu. pu.) minister ko chhora jwai' are the ones who are willing to take any kind of risk and often put the happiness of their daughtes at stake. They simply refuse to accept the life the way it is..... like to show off in everything.

If you were talking about a simple girl from a village with a simple aspirations, I would agree 100% with you, brother. But you know there are very few parents from deep down Taplegunj or Kanchanpur who are marrying off their daughters for the limousine jwai. 

 Haha lmao man, wtf I did to you anyways texasranger, kina testo hate garchas malai, peace bro
 Riddle bro I m telling the truth n i know in this world honest people r condemned. IQ lessbha bhaye aile barsa ko 100 grans kamayera Microsoft ma jagire hunna thiye. Dherai padera parera ali ali crazy chai chu.