If we wanted, we would never have a free time because knowledge is boundless and we could keep ourselves busy inquiring different aspects of life and its components. But once in a while we need breaks from our routined life, which otherwise would turn us to emotionless anthropoid machines. I was reading the threads from this website in my free time, with a hope I will learn more about my country and people and which way their thoughts are flowing. Some spark of frustration is compelling me to write this, otherwise I am one of those who doesn't like writing so much because of the fact that it requires contemplation and skills-which I am devoid of; and of course everyone wants their writing to be rhetorical. Usually, I've been champion of feminism at certain points of my life and have lot of respect for women, especially from our country because the portrait of women, showed to me through our scriptures, society, stories and even movies, is surely venerable and "feminine".
Apologies; this is about my personal thinking which might be traditional and conservative and I am open to all kind of criticism intending to change my way of thinking. I am 27 years old, came to the United States 3 years ago, did my masters and now working. Pretty much time to get married. As a matter of fact, tired of living lonely life. I am sure its not only me, but I am one of those who is always deprived of love. People might have different reasons, the easiest one is "never happened". For me, I never let it happened. Born and raised in typical "brahmin" family I was told to follow rules, focus on my study, career and objective. Its every human's desire to love and being loved. But it seemed more prudent to wait and prioritize the career first than getting hurried falling in love. So, I prefered to jack off in confinement rather than sleep around; just to act as a normal human being.
Hard life in America, pain of getting away from loving ones, lonliness, recent turn downs and harsh economic situation - what I like about these scary words is they make us a man who knows what to expect if you are struggling and want to move forward. Needless to say, America teaches us a lot of things. It will expedite our learning abilities about different aspects of our lives help us to become independent worker and thinker, list goes on.
All of a sudden I realized its now time for me to get a girl and get married, amidst this fast paced learning opportunities. But I was unaware that my search would not be as easy as my grandma told me when I was small. A random girl in a party with a glass of beer in her hand, after I told her that I dont drink, responded that nowadays women dont like guys who dont drink. Ok!!flaw in me, may be I should try it sometimes. Few months passed, on one of such random encounters, a girl asked me to get her either dutch master or wine black and mild-it doesnt matter which one. wow!! at least I have an option. But, for me drinking is more feminine than smoking. If somebody pointed a gun at me and asked to choose between two girls, I would choose the first one.
How about the education?? I, personally would never prefer a girl who run after boys during the time they are supposed to study and think that they might win a guy's heart by wearing shorts and shaking their "things". My understanding is only those women who don't believe in themselves, flaunt their assests around.
It turns me off, when the girls I meet, start talking like "you are the best guy among all the boyfriends I had". She couldn't wait, like I did. If somebody has been in a relationship 10 times before me, wouldnt that make him/her cynical? And when I say "I love you" with all my heart, it makes me scared if I am going to hear it back, because they have heard it so many times, enough to lose its value. One girl told me "sex is nothing dear, be with the one you like". But ask a girl who waited for a guy all her life, whether "his past" matters. In my opinion only those who has tainted past does not care about others past. She also added "if she had sex before you she would have plus point in the sense she knows how to do it". Hell...Even the dog know how to do it!!! She might have been cheated by her boyfriend, but how would I know that my girl is not promiscuous and did not slept around and is not like an allegator which has a pea-sized brain and always think about sex and money (in this case). A well judgemental woman would always know which men to choose so that she doesnt have to be betrayed, may be few exceptions. She would wait to the right person, unless she is so eager to get laid.
It doesn't mean all women are bad, there are equally bad men. This is just about what I recently observed and made me to think. I remembered a dude once told me that good girls go to heaven and bad girls are everywhere. If god creates relationship in heaven, I would ask for very simple feminine girl, doesnt matter whether she is blind or raped, at least her soul is pristine.
It would be better to teach the new generation children about the things like virtue, honesty, morality but also their minimal applicability in the real world. I know I sound more traditional. But I believe this is how it should be. You live once, you should love once. Rather than saying "I love you" to 10 diff people, 10 times a day, we should rather think about how we could aggrandize our partners in his or her career and life though our love. If we don't change the definition of love that we have nowadays, I will not have any sympathy for a heartbroken guy or girl. We should know that there is no right person, but there is right relationship and we are the one who make it, if we really love someone.
The fun part, I went to meditation for an hour yesterday and helped me gain composure along this tempest. I dont know there are guys who think alike. but moral of the story: meditate if you think like I do which will help you find happiness within yourself and make it less dependable on others. cheers!

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