Stand Up Continues...

Have you ever felt like a dog on leash while the bitch is standing nearby? Yes,I have, when on my wedding night, my wife went to sleep over with her Lokantis into the other room.

I quit working out when I started looking more like gigolo and less like Gerard Butler.

Here's new segment called , "I'm just sayin Bruv!!"

I’m Just Sayin' Bruv!!

You know… you came here on DV when your daughter corrects your pronunciation.  ‘Baaba “ballyack” haina “black” ho!!’

You know… you are running for president of Nepalese Society of the ---------, if you happen to be the same guy who used to pelt stones at police in front of Tri Chandra campus.

You know… you are queer if you frequently sing along Adele’s “someone like you”.

You know…you haven’t changed much if your favorite song is still the Barbie girl and your favorite band is one of these; Backstreet Boys/Boyzone/Vengaboys.

You know… you are typical Nepali if you still crave for rice and curry even after dine in at Olive garden.

You know… you are green card holder (DV) if you watch almost everything on canadanepal.net.

You know…. you are F1 when you say to yourself, “saale dhoti!! patta bha bhaye tero ma kaam garthe.”

You know… you are newcomer here if you have big Nepali flag on your wall, on your car and on your shirt. Thank you for being so patriotic.  ;)  Oh, add Nepali Congress flag to one of those society member‘s house.

You know…. you bought house on wrong neighborhood, when your white neighbor stare at you ‘coz the smell of curry from your house is driving him nuts.

You know…. you are queer when you are tagged in FB in most of the baby showers party’s pictures.

You know…you are Nepali if you just bought a digital SLR camera ‘coz of peer pressure.

You know… you are smart ass DV holder, if you joined Art class at nearby community college not because you are going to draw another Mona Lisa, but that you get $5K from FAFSA.

I'm Just Sayin' Bruv!!

Thanks, again..
Mangale.
Feedbacks are welcome & it helps me to see how can I get better.

p.s. Please be advised that "You" on the above segment inlcude everyone of us including me. Hope no one gets offended.

Reposting again.. in case if y'all missed. For more plz check out stand up comedy, mangale's monologues and more.
Thanks
Mangale.

LIKE!

I'm just saying bruv great job

Wonder who 'downvoted' the thread. A little touchy, are we? Average Nepalis don't appreciate banter when it comes to ourselves, me thinks. Or maybe it was one of those patriotic Nepalis who has Nepali flags as car stickers. 

Anyway, I don't necessarily think that only those without work authorization work for Indians. I've seen many GC holders working for Indians (cash register jobs) in CA. 

You hit the nail about D-SLRs though. What's with every average 'Nepali' Joe thinking highly of himself as a great photographer and buying expensive cameras just because his peers bought them? 

I'm yet to come across a Nepali who still listens to Backstreet boys. 

Again, quite an enjoyable monologue. Keep 'em coming. 

riddle,
You right about on who downvoted on the thread. Last time two Nepali waitresses downvoted the thread ;) I like to see people downvote or flag too because it makes me think that monologues are working. I am just sayin bruv....
Thanks everyone.

You know…you are Nepali(MANGALE) if you post the same cheap crap over and over in sajha in the hopes of getting some attention!

@28th amendment,
Thank you for putting up my crap again. I'm just sayin' bruv!

he he he enjoyed it bruv!! keep it coming

*  your assumption of F1 students are smarter than DV holder makes me believe that you must be a typical sterotypical guy
*  not all organisational presidents are savvy politicians. when i was in college, I ran nepalese society which was a plus point to my resume. I never threw stones in tri-chandra campus

* musical taste has nothing to do with your so called "change". I was fan of heavy metal, 100 % rock back then @ 9th grade, now I listen classic rock !!! listening backstreet boys n vengaboys doesnt make you old school, rather does your thinking (heck ya, you belong to that category)

* if you grew up eating rice for last 18 yrs, of course you do crave for rice. guy like you have nothing to say when a 9 years old fata$$ white boy crave for herseys & dr. pepper early morning just because he s white and he s not begging for rice. why'd you hate rice and think eating rice make you low class??

* never heard of canadanepal before your posting

* I have both nepalese and american flag on my room walls & i been here for 8-9 years. why is that newcomer thing? its your personal choice

* I did join community college at the very begining of my college days because it was cheap & yea, i did receive FAFSA. you jst jelous, ain't you?
  - From a DV-Holder, now US citizen & I dont pronounce "baylaak" for "Black" !!!

 Soul_survivor, Why so serious man? Ligthen up a bit. 

You know.... you came to US with DV if you cant take  mangale's stand up jokes without being defensive.

Haha.

Nice