Feminism 101

I was always reluctant to start but seems like someone had to start this conversation and because rest of the crowd seems silent when it matters the most and ones who are resilient have nothing meaningful to say. Once again I am here for the sake of moral obligation. I don't claim to the expert on this field, but I do want to start this debate so that we have a better understanding of whatever it means regarding our context and background that is relevant to us. Sure it stands for equality of gender but how far does it extends in terms of social, political and economic front?

 

When I think of Feminism in context of Nepal, it is not the bra burning, misandrist that comes to mind. Rather it is women who is feeling being judged by watchful eyes of society desperately yearning for her voice to be heard but unable to do so.  

Officially in Nepal, women were granted the right to vote in the year 1951 but how far have we come since then. I am glad that more and more female students have access to education but sometimes it is more of mental barrier than a physical one on the part of parents. Let's face it we live in a patriarchal society where females are seen as parting entity. Prior to 2006 Nepalese citizenship could be obtained by virtue of blood or descent only from father.

From time to time, I talk with people about feminism in Nepal and they have put different ideas forward as much as they are able to relate with it. For the smartphone generation, I found they expressed their right to dress  according to their will without being judged or comments passed. Some voiced their concern about low female representation in various aspects of society.

But I was more disheartened by something little close to my heart and personal. I had a cousin of mine. She was a really charming girl, full of life who was working as a presenter for one of the news channels back in Nepal.  One fine day, someone came to ask for her hand and hurriedly she was parted away. Married to well to do family, she had everything except her liberty to work. Her mother in law would question  such as Why do you have to work? We are providing you with everything you need. That literally crushed her.  

I still vividly remember one of my aunt who would have strange marks across her body and make numerous excuses to protect her husband. What choice did she have? In retrospect, I did not understand her stance nor the social stigma associated with divorce. Her entire life was a trap. With every silence of the family members, her right and will to live was slowly eroded away. Finally she escaped but not alive.

So what are your views on Feminism in context of Nepal? It would be really nice if we could learn what Feminism stands for  female sajhaites as well as male.

Huge hypocrisy exists in the subject of women's rights all over the world and it is even worse in Nepal. Due to heavy political influence in society, women are not given much freedom.

In our parents' generation, women were supposed to treat their men like gods. So no matter how much they were mistreated, they had to quietly suffer on their own. I have seen many older men treat their wifes like slaves who were to do things according to their whims, and if they did not do as expected, they were verbally and mentally tortured. Some unfortunate ones are even physically tortured.

That is the kind of society we grew up in and parts of the system still stays within us no matter if we live in the US or anywhere else.

Our mothers cooked for us, cleaned after us and did everything household, and unconsciously we expect a little bit of that from our significant others. We are however more open minded since we realize that we have to share the household work. A lot has changed in our generation, as we see both the husband and wife sharing household work.

In many ways things have changed for the better but still the man dominated outlook has not changed. A man feels powerful with the number of girls he sleeps with, but then doesn't want his sisters, daughters to sleep with any men till they are married. That is the biggest hypocrisy of them all.

Feminism in sajha means being able to post freely without being harrassed by likes of gorikopoi,masane and bittertruth.

Sajha is mini reflection of our society where people have changed their location but not mindset. It is place where sexual verbiage is thrown as projectile at every possible avenue. most people here will silently endorse and watch this Tamasha.