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Kumari: a Life from a Goddess to a Human

-- by Astitwa Team

 

Imagine your life when you are being treated as an extraordinary person, being worshipped as incarnation of a goddess and people are gathering in thousands and thousands just to catch a glimpse of you! You become the lucky charm for people and your mood decides if they will prosper or decline. You have your caretakers to constantly watch for your needs. You never have to set your feet on the ground for there is a grandiose chariot waiting for you outside. You get everything you wish for, everything!

And then suddenly, one day, everything you had is snatched away from you. There is no chariot and no crowd for you now. You are no longer the same extraordinary person that you were moments before. Imagine the bruising when you tumble back to earth. All that remains with you is the memory of the past which you can cherish life long, and what lies ahead is not just a long life but the never ending struggle to live it through as an ordinary person.

This is the fate of so many young Shakya girls in Nepal where the tradition of worshiping a deified young girl as the incarnation of Taleju Bhawani is still prevalent. Called Kumari, which means a virgin, the young girl has to go through a series of subsequent tests to prove that she is a goddess. The girl must be aged from 3 to 7. The Kumari should have no physical defects (not even a small scratch in her body). She should have ‘32 perfections’, including thighs like a deer, eyelashes like a cow and voice as clear as a duck. After the girls have passed through this first stage of their test, another one begins. On the night of Navaratri (which falls during Dashain), the girls are made to enter a room with slaughtered buffaloes and goats, and masked men. If the girl feels scared, she has failed. Another girl is brought in. The girl who shows no signs of fear is supposed to be the real Kumari, for courage is Taleju Bhawani’s main temperament. The girl is believed to have possessed the spirit of Taleju Bhawani and is chosen as the Royal Kumari. Thus Kumari is believed to be an earthly manifestation of the powerful goddess Taleju Bhawani who, (as history says) offended by a Malla king, would be appeased only by a young virgin. The traditional belief is that as long as a Kumari is sacrificed to Taleju Bhawani , she will not express her rage and thus peace and prosperity will sustain in the country

The Royal Kumari then lives in Kumari House at Basantapur, which is a store house of magnificent intricate carvings. The Virgin Goddess performs her daily rituals at this place. Now that she is a goddess, she is expected to behave like one. She ought to remain calm and pacified. All day, she sits on a lion throne, offering blessings to her devotees.

This life may seem like a fairytale for some. But this is not just all. There is a side of Kumari that is dark-as dark as the rooms of Kumari Ghar. A young girl is selected as a Kumari. No one asks her what she wants. The young girl, who would otherwise be in school playing with her friends, is suddenly removed from a conventional social environment and kept in a controlled environment. No one wants to know if she is willing to lead a life away from her family members. She is not allowed to see her family members often. She has caretakers to attend to her needs, but she is also under a vigilant watch just in case she does something that she is not supposed to do. The young girl remains there until she reaches puberty. It is believed that Taleju Bhawani leaves her body after she menstruates. But if she is unlucky, even a small scratch or a bruise can be a nightmare. The girl no longer remains a goddess. Search for a new Kumari begins.

The most dreadful part of this tradition is the life of Kumari after she menstruates. Habituated, to eat specially prepared meals, to enjoy limited supplicants, to be treated and worshipped as goddess she wouldn’t obviously be prepared to live a life where she is expected to cook, walk in shoes, share her room with her siblings and help in household chores.Thus living together would be a difficult transition for her as well as her family. Earlier Kumari weren’t taught to read and write as people thought a goddess would know everything. This would make their lives even more difficult afterwards as they cannot be self reliant. However today, Kumari are home schooled at Kumari Ghar and it eases their transition to a normal life to some extent. However there is a very awful superstition that says- the husband of an ex Kumari dies young; so people fear to marry an ex-Kumari. Thus, even after she gets back to a normal life, she cannot live it as others do; as there are so many complications that surround her.

Sajani Shakya, an ex Kumari was stripped off her title because of her trip to U.S to promote a British-made documentary exploring Nepal's tradition. The religious leaders stated that she flouted the rules and thus her godliness and her sanctity were gone. Also, once a Kumari tried to escape from Kumari Ghar. The reason is obvious- She might not have liked the restricted environment or she might not have enjoyed her life as a Kumari. And the priests performed a long ritual to seek forgiveness from Taleju Bhawani for having chosen a wrong Kumari. With all these hypes associated with this tradition, a question still persists: Is the Kumari tradition justifiable? Is it right to take away childhood from a child? Or the daughter who ought to be with her family members at this tender age?

Does anyone bother to understand the trauma that she may have to go through when she has to adjust to a “normal” life?

With a society that is so rooted in traditions and cultures and beliefs, no one gives the child and her feelings a second look. If one would, they would sense her loneliness and also her trauma. And now that we know, it is up to us to judge which one deserves more importance: our traditions or our humanity?

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This myth of young girl being incarnation of Taleju Bhawani is written by Indian priest if you look at the historical background. just like how nepal former king was also written as incarnation of hindu god vishnu at one time. those writing were done by south indian priest sankararcharya who wanted to please nepalese people. of course this tradition should be stop throught education.

@Nepalbitich  I think it's better to stop your big mouth right now , you 're talking from your a$$ and it's freaking every body out that you are trolling over sajha like a pagal kutta .I know you don't know a shitttt..

@fantush
i am telling the truth that hinduism became corrupted after indian components were brought into nepal
and mixed with the local(native nepalis) religions. do you actually believe that nepal king was avatar of hindu god vishnu?
common man this myth was made up by south indian priest during the malla period.

@Nepalbitich Believing or not believing is not your concern or business ,everyone have their rights to believe !!  Like you said you believe you came from Ke-RAT then i will say you came from Rat's ass that's what i believe about you ,you don't try to make me what you believe is Right OK????

@fantush
so you still deneid the truth. Hinduism became corrupted because of the culture that has it's origin in India, not Nepal.
For example the caste system and dowry system that are found in Hindu society had its origin in India. There wasn't any such kind of culture in indignious nepalese culture. such corrupting culture were brought from india and mixed with the local traditions.
nepal need to recognize this fact and tried to erdaicate any system, culture that do not belong in Nepal.

well said. nepal dosen't need caste system nor should the woman has to suffer. all these indian culture must be eradicated from nepali society the sooner the better. i am buddhist and i condone such behavior and culture of hindus.

@gopalgrg,you said it right.We as people of the 21st century should end these ill-practices.And we are going in the right direction though a lot is to be done.Its so culturally  engraved in  people and will take time but we ll one day come over it.Its even seen in gurung and magars(like the who is higher ranked between the 4 jaate and the 16 jaate gurungs) and other janajatis and not just the aryans.

Well solta,regarding buddhist culture being nepalese and hindu culture being indian,i dont know how much knowledge do u have abt buddhism but its just hinduism 2.0 and is a purely indian thought system based on hinduism.
If u regard buddhism nepali coz we pahadi people (including sherpas) follow a primitive form of pagan bon religion mixed with buddhism ,u ought to know it has been the religion of brahmins of north india for 1500+ years till the islamic invasion.And sages like Nagarjuna and bodhidharma have been critical to the development of mahayana tradition which was later brought to tibetan highlands through kashmir and ladakh and then came to nepal with the sherpas integrating stuffs and rituals of bon religion .The gurungs ,magars and tamangs recieved buddhism as late as 17th century with the tibetan influx in nepalese mountains.Thats when they gave up their pagan religion and took buddhism as their confession.
Hinduism was practiced by the people of awadh,tirahut and koch-bihar for thousands of years and hence too is our religion(but from ur opinion i get that u dont consider them nepalese).Even christianity is ours .But not the missionaries and jesuits.

@shiva_linga
yes we gurungs also have the system but we are not as rigid as the one practice in Hindu society. we don't discrimnate to the point where we are not allowed to intermarry or not allow to drink from 16 jaate gurung. 4 jaate being higher ranking/.
4 jaate mingle and marry with 16 jaate and it's not something like in aryan caste system where dalits are not even allowed to enter the house of so call high ranking caste or used the same water tap. gurung stratified system was created to divide gurung families lineage.

about hinduism i never said hiinduism was never part of nepal. i just want to separatae Indian based Hinduism from Nepali based Hinduism. actually before the advent of licchavis, indigenious local people like newar, rai, limbus had their own verson of hinduism. they mostly follow shivaite form of hinduism. that nepal in the early time had absent of vedic, brahamanical form of rituals, rites and custom that are prevalent today. it's only after the advent of licchavis that local population  in kathmandu valley was influenced by the vedic form of hinduism. and with the arrival of licchavis, this statified system or caste system was intorduced by the licchavi king. and  yes the licchavi king brough vedic form of hindusim. they brough the statue of narayan(sleeping vishnu) through forced labor from india.
it was at this period that nepali based hinduism merged with indian based hinduism. the fusion of nepali religion + indian religion paved away for the creation of modern Hinduism.

gurung on the other hands has always been buddhist and also include bon religion although some of us were later influenced by the hinduism and became hindus. i have no regret for that because hinduism and buddhism co-existed in nepal for unknown times now.
sherpas, tamang, thakali are predomnately buddhist. as for magar it is quite complex. many have became hindus mainly because that's where p.n shah started his unification. some magar told me they are buddhist. yet i have seen and experience that magar also have their own local deities and they pray to their forefathers(ancestor's worship) just like rai and limbus.

@NepaliBitch, Even if whatever you said is true, Everybody points a middle finger on you because you are a scumbag and doesn't belong here in sajha